What made you want to be a counselor?

[summer_rain]

Hi everyone, after my first counseling course session I was interested to know what people's reasons were for wanting to train as a counselor? Do people think there are 'good' and 'bad' reasons for deciding to embark on this career? Ive got my own thoughts but id like to hear others first :):arms:

[Steve]

Hi Summer Rain. I spent many years volunteering as a counsellor (which I still do) because I wanted to help people experiencing emotional difficulties. It seemed like a natural progression for me to study to become a professional counsellor. What is your motivation?

[Cherrypie]

Hi Summer rain, lovely question and I am interested to hear what other people say too.

I am still only training but I too have volunteered to help others in the past and that has felt meaningful and rewarding to me, then my own expereince of counselling after a crisis truly inspired me. My counsellor was just amazing.

I realised after a few sessions 'aha this is what I want to do.' almost like this is what I have been waiting my whole life to discover! Quite amazing really.. I have never before had any idea what to do with my life until right now! I love people and I am naturally very inquisitive (apparently I wore out my mother with why?) and I'm quite calm so I suppose it just seems to suit who I am...I hope..if I ignore my slight insanity..

Ahem.. anyway.. Thankyou for reminding me why I started my training as sometimes when all the self reflecting gets tough I fear I will not make it and as much as I want to do this I may not be best suited.. Hopefully I will get there in the end!

Only time will tell!

xCherrypie

[Jenny]

I personally do think there are 'good' and 'bad' reasons to want to be a counsellor... normally though these would be picked up some time before qualifying though either through the self awareness drawn upon in the course, or in personal therapy/supervision.

In hindsight i think i always wanted to be a counsellor so that i could 'help others'. I thought this was totally altruistic, but really it's not. In a sense i think i wanted to help others in order to help myself feel better - and i don't think there's anything necessarily wrong with that as long as the counsellor isn't dependant on helping others in order to feel ok about themselves.

Personally i wanted to try to work out what was "wrong" with me.. i've spent a lot of my teenage years and early 20s unhappy and i couldn't figure out why.. the transactional analysis course helped me come to terms with a few things and i guess i wanted to pass on that to others.. but i know full well that i'm not in the right frame of mind to actually practise counselling so i stopped after 1 year.

What was i trying to say!? Umm yes i guess what i'm trying to say is about the 'wounded healer' type thing - i personally think that while it's ok (and normal!) that counsellors will be wounded in some way, i think it'd be not good for someone to want to be a counsellor just to fulfil their own personal needs.

Dunno if that makes sense and of course it's just my opinion.. and i'm by no means a counsellor!

[Cherrypie]

I always love your honesty Jenny, its funny you mentioned something I have worried about..

I have often wondered about this issue of helping and wondering whether it was in fact my being my selfish. Do I just want to help others to feel better about myself.. I'm really not sure as that feels quite deep somehow but it seems likely I suppose. Maybe thats another thread??

I'm also not sure how much it matters as long as you are self aware and doing good but its an interesting thought..


xx

[Jenny]

When i was doing the postgrad diploma in psychology we had to do an essay on altruism and whether it truly exists - i came to the conclusion that pure altruism doesn't exist so at the end of the day we'll all be doing things, whether that be our job, replying to threads on a forum, calling a friend, etc. which somehow satisfy a need within us. I'd definitely agree that as long as the action is positive and 'good' then to a certain extent the 'why' shouldn't matter.

But then i also think counselling is a little different in that it's important for the counsellor to be self aware (as you say) enough to take things to supervision and really be aware of counter transference or own needs/beliefs getting in the way. I dunno if i'm explaining what i mean very well.. i know what i mean anyway!

:cheer:

[summer_rain]

Thanks everyone for your comments. I wanted to draw particular focus to Jenny's point as personally that's what I mean about 'helping others' and I agree that its not wrong as long as it isn't a codependent type action. Personally I used to be a people pleaser so I bare that in mind and for that reason I want to do the training but I don't think of considering a career from it-- at least not at the moment :)



In hindsight i think i always wanted to be a counsellor so that i could 'help others'. I thought this was totally altruistic, but really it's not. In a sense i think i wanted to help others in order to help myself feel better - and i don't think there's anything necessarily wrong with that as long as the counsellor isn't dependant on helping others in order to feel ok about themselves.

[mel]

For me there were and still are many reasons why I chose to become a helper.
One of the most precious gifts in life [for me] is to be alive and to be able to feel alive and loved.
To help others be able to discover this treasure is a job worth doing.

[ell]

I'm not a counsellor yet, but I'd like to become one because I'd like to help people and I love listening to people's stories. I just think it's a job that you could never be bored or unfufilled from.