Who decides how often you see the counsellor?

[shrinknightmare]

I have been seeing a shrink weekly. I thought it was her deciding that. She then told me that it was up to me to decide how often I see her. So i changed the appointment to fortnightly. Then I decided that I cannot keep seeing her and have to make a break at sometime, so cancelled the next appointment. So now I haven't seen her in 4 weeks.

Work Management actually sent me to see her after the death of my daughter, but my boss (different person) at work doesn;t like me seeing her weekly. Every time I go he says you are going again and in work time. But work told me I had to go for an assessment and to get back to full duties. At work I complete my work very quickly and am often looking around for stuff to do.

Now I am really feeling really crappy and close to tears. I mean I don;t know in mysellf how often I should be seeing her. How do you know how often you should be seeing someone?

[Sorrel]

What do you feel you really need at this time?

[Jenny]

Sounds really difficult, like you are being pulled in different directions. I think Sorrel has a good point - what do you feel you want at this time? If you could choose regardless of any other pressures, what would you want? x

[shrinknightmare]

I want to be 6 feet under.

[Jenny]

I'm sorry to hear that.. hope you get the help and support you need and deserve right now x

[Cherrypie]

I was sad to read your post shrinknightmare.. How are you doing today?

I think if you were paying privately the idea is you see someone as long as you feel you need to but it probably is more complicated when work are paying for it though. The bottom line is they look at resources and what is best for the organisation etc.. . I should think they are lucky you are not off work completely. An hour out of a week after what you have been through does not seem too much in my opinion...I would have thought they would allow it without a fuss, especially as you say your work is always done.

I am not clear why you decided to stop. Is it because your boss has put you under pressure by making it clear he/she doesn't like you going weekly or because you feel you have had enough? I think this is important. I wonder if the sudden break rather than a gradual reduction of support has upset you and caused this onset of tearfulness. It would be understandable.. Your Work..particularly your boss doesn't sound like they are being as helpful as they could be..

Had you been finding the counselling helpful at all? I go with Sorrel and Jenny...what do you need? Maybe if you do feel you need some more counselling time you could consider going privately? Then you go when you want to go, at whatever frequency that suits you and for how long you want to..

Wanted to say I was thinking of you and I hope you let us know how you are doing..

xCherrypie

[shrinknightmare]

I actually changed it because the boss at work always asks me about going and made comments about me going every week.

I went back to work one week after the funeral.

Was buying fish n chips the other day and had a look in a magazine and sure enough there was an article in there about her.

I don't really know how often I should be going, I rather her tell me. I also had a minor incident happen at my dog club, where I was looking forward to competing but the comp is 5 hours drive away and no one will help me with driving, and then a lady's dog was interfearing with my dog, and she wouldn't help by moving it. I know these are such minor things but made me feel unwanted, especially when I help other people out.

I just so much want to exit this planet. I am bored at work, I get my work done in 1 hour today. I like to keep busy, I ask other people for work to do and have nothing for me to do, but I know they do.